The Best Sex Toys You Can Use In Public
It all started when a friend of mine told me her sextoy pregame secret: Fucking publicI thought. Not only did this surface weird anxieties about my "loose" vagina that society has trained me to irrationally fear, but it pissed me off. At least prior to this info, I had assumed the strength of your vagina was Out of Your Control, like your first nose, or the birth year you pay someone to erase from your Wikipedia page when you get famous.
Out of sight, out public mind right? Wrong, apparently. Fast-forward two years and my editor has assigned me to train my p-slur with a kegel toy, for journalism, of course! Attention Pulitzer committee: You must specify Cosmopolitan. Cue panic! The technology of kegel weights has vastly improved in the past two years.
There are now kegel exercisers, like the Lovelife Krush that I tried, that utilize bluetooth to send you real-time feedback while you clench, testing the strength of your PC muscles. Silicon Valley has not failed women! Stop saying that! What is cool however, is the ability for the kegel trainer to spring into little sextoy modes, vibrating at certain intervals to jolt your PC muscles into contracting public strengthening. The Krush is a wonky little pink silicone kegel trainer that looks like two rubber balls with a tail.
No such luck! I had scored the lowest of the low across the board in almost every public This stupid app told me I was basically sextoy physical equivalent of someone who had just squeezed a tiny human out of their birth canal, minus the miracle. Would going out in public with the trainer be a fun experience?
The Best Ever Sex Toys You Can Use In Public
It seemed daunting. Secondly, this puppy vibrates — audibly. Nevertheless, I soldiered on. I recruited a friend who was willing to walk around Brooklyn together, listening for any rogue sounds emanating from my vagina and also act as general support lest I sneeze and the whole thing clatters out on the floor of the Whole Foods in Williamsburg and I have to chase after it on my hands and knees past the LaCroix wall.
First up, we public up a coffee shop. I turned the trainer to teen with huge clitoris mode outside and almost immediately I had to lean on a nearby pole, I was so taken aback.
Here's What Happened When I Used a Kegel Sex Toy in Public
Sextoy up is a whole 'nother thing. The device pulsed inside me and I pictured my vagina as this cavernous thing, amplifying each rattle and shake, despite my friend promising the sound was barely noticeable.
We shopped around for a bit and I almost forgot I was wearing this thing. Almost all anxieties of it falling out of me ceased; I could only tell when I would run across the street to catch a light.
Cocky from my previous encounter in the bookstore, we headed into another, even smaller bookstore. There was one man sitting in a small desk in the center, reading. Aside from two other customers public, it was dead quiet. The other customer browsing near us looked up from her book and I scrambled to turn it off. Immediately I started sweating along my hairline. At this point I had to pee, badly. We bolted and made our way into a pizza shop, where I ran inside to the bathroom.
So I removed sextoy, walked over to the sink with my pants at my ankles, and washed it off before settling in for what felt like the most blissful pee of my whole life. I dried the thing under the hand dryer and wrapped it in toilet paper, tucking it into a zippered compartment in my purse, worried about how long I took in there. But when I got out, there was a drunk man belting Sara Bareilles in the pizza shop, sextoy you know.
Weirder things. My initial pressure had gone up to 50 from my original triggering AF score of 29 out ofmy endurance stayed the same at four seconds, and my max strength increased to 56 from 44 again out of Men will literally stick their dick in anything, so who cares! Follow Carina on Twitter. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories.
Katie Buckleitner. LoveLife Krush. I was basically the physical equivalent of someone who just gave birth, minus the miracle. Advertisement - Continue Reading Below. Facebook Launches Big fake perfect tits Dating App.